I dreamed the world was ending again, but instead of the usual (skies of blood and continents bathed in fire) the universe was coming apart in what could best be described as a “reality failure.” My Uncle and I were frantically searching for the last remaining fragments of physical existence in an attempt to stave off our disintegration as long as possible. Eventually however, we realized it was all useless, and my Uncle tried to coax me into accepting this change of form. I remember arguing with him about it: he would say that we should not fear drastic changes in consciousness and should worship God in all circumstances, whereas I would argue that God never had to put up with not being God anymore. Eventually, however, I felt everything melting around me and my Uncle said, “If we remain self-aware, I’ll see you on the other side of the black hole.”
I felt my body melting away, and then suddenly I and the rest of my family were floating about in some type of parallel universe — however it wasn’t really that different from the reality we know now. It was almost as though we existed in a bad alternate reality sitcom — humorous shows were on a device equivalent to a television and some of my family was complaining that there “shouldn’t be reruns in the afterlife.”
Eventually however, one of the strangers with us started asking a bunch of questions about our purchasing habits and finally I realized that everything, including the “reality failure,” had been concocted as a marketing research scheme by Microsoft. The questioner pulled off a mask and revealed himself to be Bill Gates. “I’m surprised I was able to maintain the illusion as long as I did,” he said, and my attitude was an “Oh, you!” amused annoyance more than anything. I remember being relieved that life would continue as before.
In another dream, I was approaching a Muslim Imam — crawling forward on my knees between two rows of people smoking long pipes. When I finally reached the Imam, his assistant turned to me and said “Greetings.” The word echoed through parallel realities and existence shattered before me like broken glass. “I am the second to the one true God,” he said, his face the only thing in all of existence, and I remember thinking that everything I had been taught about religion was wrong. “You will now take my place as the Imam’s second,” he said, and departed. I took my place to the right of the Imam and began distributing the same advice and comfort to supplicants that he did. I gained the ability to splinter consciousness into fragments just as he had, and I remember various individuals involved in the Palestinian conflict coming to ask for advice which I was able to disburse with inexplicable wisdom.
Then a strange woman came seeking assistance, and it was revealed that she was actually a nun. She removed the burqa she had been using as a disguise and grabbed me, saying that I was committing blasphemy and should return to the Catholic fold. (I’m not a Catholic, but whatever.) I felt myself falling
backward through the ground as female voices chanted Hail Marys around me — feelings of guilt and shame overwhelmed me and I knew that my abilities were being taken away by her intonations. As I felt my consciousness slipping away I woke up.